How to Avoid having Negative People in your Life

There’s an old saying, “Birds of a feather flock together.”

The logic behind it is that we tend to become like the people we hang out with.

If you’re around “cannot, should not, and do not” people, then you’ll constantly be discouraged and depressed. Instead, surround yourself with visionaries and those who can inspire and motivate you so you can, should, and do take action.

People tend to be generous when sharing their nonsense, fear, and ignorance. And while they seem quite eager to feed you their negativity, please remember that sometimes the diet we need to be on is a spiritual and emotional one. Be cautious with what you feed your mind and soul. Fuel yourself with positivity and let that fuel propel you into positive action.” ― Steve Maraboli

Following your intuition can be an valuable way of weeding out negative people early on when first meeting them.

How to Spot Negative People

Here are some body language signs to look out for when you meet new people:

• A sick or uncomfortable feeling forms in the pit of your stomach.
• The hair on the back of your neck stands on end.
• Your skin crawls and you feel jumpy and adverse to touch.
• Your shoulder muscles knot up and your throat and chest constrict.
• You feel a sense of pressure, agitation, or darkness.
• You feel physically, mentally, or emotionally drained after meeting the individual.

These symptoms may be your body’s way of telling you to stay clear of this person. You may leave their presence feeling depressed and discouraged because all you’ve heard is complaining.

Relationships with negative people are simply tedious encounters with porcupines. You don’t have the remote knowledge how to be close to them without quills being shot in your direction.” ― Shannon L. Alder

Naturally, this sucks the energy right out of you, but you can learn to read these signs early on and you’ll save yourself from becoming involved with a negative person. These people are toxic and will poison your mind with their negativity.

Seek Out People with Positive Attitudes

Sometimes you can tell someone is positive just by their outward appearance or the way they conduct themselves. Walking confidently with their head up or even smiling are signs that a person is in a positive mood.

Some other signs of a positive person are more intuitive, such as:

• You get a feeling of familiarity – as if you’ve known the person forever.
• You feel relaxed, calm, and safe.
• You breathe easier.
• You lean forward instead of crossing your arms defensively and withdrawing.
• You’re at ease with the other person’s touch (hug, handshake, etc.).
• You leave their presence feeling energized and alive.

Just as negative people put out a negative energy, positive people have positive energy. These people are nourishing and supportive. Your body can pick up on this and warn you or encourage you depending on the situation.

How do we go about finding these positive people we wish to associate with? Much of the above responses are simply felt in our day-to-day associations.

However, there are proactive steps we can take to align ourselves with positive people:

• Find a local community event, club, or group where people challenge themselves and encourage their members to be better people. They will help you set goals for yourself and then achieve them.

• Participate in online forums or organize your own positive mentoring group. Sometimes it’s impossible to completely avoid certain negative people (perhaps a boss or family member), but you can limit your relationship with them and seek out positive role models elsewhere.

• Utilize your positive support system to prevent the negative people in your life from getting the best of you. Rely on your friends or family when you need to vent to get rid of your negative emotions.

The choices you make in life are yours alone. It’s completely in your power to choose who you are friendly with and whether you want to live a happy life or be miserable.

There is a magnificent, beautiful, wonderful painting in front of you! It is intricate, detailed, a painstaking labor of devotion and love! The colors are like no other, they swim and leap, they trickle and embellish! And yet you choose to fixate your eyes on the small fly which has landed on it! Why do you do such a thing?” ― C. JoyBell C.

If you feel too much negativity, take control of your life and make some changes to eliminate the negative sources. This will likely take some time but making these changes will help improve your daily mood and remind you that good things are ahead.

Photo: Chris Ford